Judgement

Once again, I find myself sitting here and thinking. Thinking about Angela and what she is going through. That poor girl, all she wanted was some help, and Bob just ripped her apart, trying to make her look like a bad mother, and a whore, and a lowlife. But after talking to her, I don't see that she is any of those things. I know what it's like to miss my children, I know what it's like to lose my home. I know what it's like to have to ask for help, and I know what it's like to be judged. If I could do anything in the world, I would devote myself to helping women like myself. We were dealt a shitty hand. We've been raped, beaten, and abused by the ones we thought loved us. We've been taken advantage of, and all we ever asked for is to be normal. To have a life, a family, a fulfilling job, stability. But once you have that curse, it's hard to break.

Bipolar

It's been about two weeks since I've been on this downward spiral, I'm trying to come out of it, but I can't even get out of bed. I hear these voices in my head telling me that my chances of having a happy fulfilling life are over, and the only thing left to do is lay there. Even the small things, like getting up to eat, or go pee, I don't want to do. I hate it when people call me, or try and talk to me. It's just really annoying. I want everyone and everything to just go away. To leave me alone. My husband wants me to talk to him about my feelings, and it was really hard at first. I couldn't get the words out, I was so unbelievably overwhelmed with my feeling that I couldn't get them out.  There is so much going on in my head. Racing thoughts, worries and fears that everything is constantly falling apart. I need help.  God, send me a sign.